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The Idiot Box

Reviews & Criticisms of all things Film related.

Category

Action

Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance (2011)

What the hell was that shit?

That was my first thought after watching it the first time years ago. Yes I remember! Okay I don’t, that was a lie. In fact, I don’t remember my reaction at all, which is funny, because I couldn’t remember what the movie was about. I know I’ve seen it, so when it popped up on  my Netflix feed I was like “Oh yeah, I remember that movie! Do they have the first one? No, dammit fine I’ll watch this.”

Then after watching the movie, I promptly forgot it all over again. It is a really, really unremarkable film, and easily forgettable.

What the hell is it about? Well, it’s a sequel to the 2007 film Ghost Rider, starring Nicolas Cage. That’s all I remember.  For real, after watching the film, which I literally just finished watching half an hour ago, I had to go and IMDB it to remember the plot.

Apparently, Johnny Blaze, a.k.a Ghost Rider, is in Europe for unknown reasons. Whilst there, some people ask for his help to stop the devil (that villain from the first movie) who is trying to take on a human form.

I did not get that at all.

  1. The devil is already in human form. He was in the first one too, so…huh?
  2. I vaguely recall thinking that the kid was possessed or the son of the devil or something as equally as stupid as that.

Does anyone else have the same problem trying to remember this movie? It is such a shame that is so forgettable, because the first one was pretty awesome. Johnny was like the new Evil Knievel, there was cool motorbike stunts, selling his soul to save his dad, he drove up buildings and on the archways of bridges whilst on fire. It was a pretty entertaining thing to watch. With the sequel, I feel as if there was no motivation in making the film at all, except to try and squeeze as much money at the box office as possible. Which admittedly, that is what most films are made for these days (cough*batmanvssuperman* end cough).

I do somewhat remember one thing that was annoying; the intermittent anime bits. Why the hell were they in there? It was such an unnecessary device to use for telling some side-story or for having flashbacks. Were they trying to mimic the comic books? Or were they trying to pay a homage to Kill Bill? (I’m sure Kill Bill also took the idea from something else, like everything else in the film did, but I don’t care enough right now to look into it).

Seriously, what the hell was with this film? I can’t even really remember when the Ghost Rider went all fire-y just to beat the crap out of someone. There was nothing of substance at all, even in the action scenes!

God this film sucked balls.

Has anyone seen Ghost Rider in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D? I’ve only seen bits and pieces through ads and whatnot so I can’t tell if the new version is any good or not. God I hope it’s a better interpretation.

I give this movie a 1.5 out of 5. Wait, why am I doing that? It doesn’t deserve the half point!

I give this movie a 1 out of 5, and only because Nicolas Cage is in it, and the one thing I remember with clarity in the film was Nic doing that weird over-acting crazy guy thing that only he seems to be able to do.

Or am I getting confused with the first one?…..Screw it.

1 out of 5!!!

 

Suicide Squad (2016)

Suicide Squad is Warner Bros latest attempt to copycat the success of Marvel films with their adaptation of DC comics. And that’s their biggest problem right there. They are trying too hard to be like Marvel, and they can’t be. Although the Marvel films are incredibly different from the comics, they are enjoyable because they have a good story, funny dialogue that isn’t too cheesy, and plot holes that are easy to overlook within the scope of the story, because everything else is pretty awesome.

DC comics are notably more darker than their competitor, and any attempt to try and make them more family friendly, really does not do them justice. Not only does it insult the fans, but it is a giant middle finger to the incredibly in depth stories that the comics hold.

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Jason Bourne (2016)

I have mixed feelings about this movie. I liked the previous films, including The Bourne Legacy. This newest addition to the franchise gives us everything that we had previously been given in the other films. Espionage, conspiracy, intrigue, fast paced action. The downside to all of this, is that it is expected and not all that invigorating. There is nothing in this film that we haven’t seen before, and after four movies, there should be more to the story.

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The Legend of Tarzan (2016)

It’s hard to appreciate a film when you are in a packed cinema and seated between a noisy teenager who continually elbows you as their lanky form moves about when checking their messages from bae every ten seconds, and an overzealous fan who makes loud inappropriate catcalls at Alexander Skarsgard whenever he is topless (f.y.i, this is 85% of the film). Despite this, when they both shut up, I was able to enjoy the film.

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Independence Day: Resurgence

Despite what the majority of critical reviews are saying, this film is quite fun to watch. I actually enjoyed it quite a lot. Despite the fact that at times it felt as if there were too many characters and the plot seemed ridiculous, this film packs a lot of explosions and some  great effects that are a joy to see play out.

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The Nice Guys (2016)

Shane Black is one of my favourite writers/directors. His movies are always action packed and humorous, and are almost always about cops or private detectives, and his new film hasn’t disappointed me.

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London Has Fallen

Unlike it’s predecessor Olympus Has Fallen, this film, London Has Fallen, is kind of tame.

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Batman vs. Superman: Dawn of Justice

I’ve just come home from the cinema after seeing this movie, and I’m not going to do a proper review about the whole thing. I only have a few things to say about it. Possible Spoiler alert!

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In the Heart of the Sea

Normally I would make a review the same day of viewing or a day or two after. It has been a week since I saw this film, and only now am I bored enough to write a review. Which pretty much sums up how I feel about the film. I only saw it because I was bored and there was nothing else to watch, and the film itself was relatively dull and overdrawn. Within the first twenty minutes I was looking at my watch, wondering just how much time was left.

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